What The Hell Is ADD?
by stars.are.falling.all.for.us
Summary: a dare, a distraction, and a damsel-not-so-much-in-distress.


_so uhh, yeah.  
here's a standalone.  
it was for a contest i did on the mcfly boards.  
please review.  
its only polite and it's not like it's gonna kill you.  
:)  
so yeah, yada yada yada, I don't own mcfly, continues rambling, and, on with the story.

* * *

_  
"What's wrong? Poor old Poynter afraid of a little bet?" Tom asked me. Pfft! Dougie Poynter? Afraid of a bet? When hell freezes over!

That's a good line. I think I'll say that out loud.

"When hell freezes over!" I said, earning impressed looks from Danny and Harry. Ah, for once you have decided to function up there, good old brainey.

Tom handed me the revolting attire- hey! I understood attire! What a day this is turning out to be, two smart moments and I get to wear spandex?! The gods are watching over me.

* * *

"Dougie, what the flippin' hell do you think this is?!" Paula said, slamming the newspaper on the kitchen counter. 

Uhh.. Okay. This is where we decide if we're feeling smart-assed or not, brainey. Okay, I'm going with smart-assed. She _did_ interrupt my waffle time. Thanks, brainey!

Brainey, how unoriginal. I think you deserve a better name. What about.. Bob?

You alright with Bob?

Rightio then, I christen thee Bob the Brain.

"A newspaper. You see, people who don't have TV's or Radio's or access to the Interweb or whatever it's called, also want to know the news. Like, what's going on in the world and stuff. So the smart people with ink and paper, they came up with the idea of-" Man, does she like to interrupt. Tom's right. What _do_ I see in her?!

Oh right. **Those.** Damn, talk about hot and bothered.

"I know what it IS, you idiot. What I don't know is what that picture's doing there!" she screeched.

HAHA! It was from the gig! Those tights sure did feel good.

"Tom dared me." I shrugged, returning to my waffles. Okay, so she may not be the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree, but whoa, her waffles are like God's gift to earth.

"Dougie, are you ever gonna grow up? You're twenty-three for God's sake. I don't even know what I'm doing here anymore."

"What _are_ you doing here?" I asked, confused by the whole situation.

Girls are weird.

"I don't know, I thought, maybe I could be the one who turned you into a big boy, you know?" she said seductively.

Whoa ho! Poynter's getting some to- Oh my god. All-new Transformers:Animated episodes?

NO WAY! NO FUCKING WAY!!

"Paula, where are you going?" I asked. Why is she going? We were having fun! Well, until I turned on the TV that is.

"To someone more mature than you, I can tell you that." she huffed.

* * *

So now here I am, in the pub, with Danny and Harry. Tom had gone round to his girlfriend's I'm guessing. But ah well. Who needs him? Or Paula? Or Yaks? Uhh. Yeah. 

"**And I have to do this for how long?**" I asked Danny, as we sat at the bar eyeing potential prey.

He and Harry had drunkenly devised a cunning dare for me to endure. Pinging random girl's bras.

"Five girls and then it's Harry's turn!" Danny said, before taking a gulp of his half-empty beer glass.

"Okay! Here I go. Watch me, yeah?"

"I'll put my phone light up up after when we've counted when you've counted done five bra's girls." Harry slurred. Okay, that totally made sense.

"Huh? Yeah? What? Harry you're not making sense! Bob's hurting!" I yelled.

"Just go, chicken." Danny said, as he pushed me out of the booth.

Okay, here we go.

Ooh, girl in a green dress! Just like the one I wore!

_Ping number one._  
And.. Run!

Ah-ha! Paula look-a-like.

_Ping number two._ HARD ping number two.

Whoa, Sprint!

_Ping number thr_-Oh my goodness gracious god. I think I've died and gone to heaven. And they say I only go for shallow ones! That girl has got to be, the most beautiful girl ever to grace this dinky club. Yes, you heard me right, Bob. Beautiful. Not sexy, not hot.

B-E-A-UTIFUL.

Ping? Don't ping?

Oh no, I can't make up my mind.. Wait, where's she gone? She was there a minute ag-OW!

OW! OW! OW!  
**WEDGIE!!!!!**

"Who the hell was that?! I swear, Danny, if you.. Oh. Uhh.. Hi." I stammered. Turns out the angel had given me a wedgie and is now hysterically laughing her bum off. Whoa, that was a strange sentence.

"Comfy down there?" She said once she'd calmed down. She was still smirking though. Pfft. And I thought I'd fallen in love with her!

Now that I think about it, it is quite uncomfortable down there.

Okay, WHAT is she doing?!

SHE PULLED DOWN MY PANTS!

THAT GIRL PULLED DOWN MY PANTS!

"And THAT'S for pinging my best friend's bra!" she yelled, as she laughed her way out of the crowd.

Ugh. What a night.

* * *

"Yeah, and then she randomly pulls down my pants and runs away laughing like a maniac!" I told Danny as we headed home. My hands found their way into my jeans pocket and strangely enough, there was a piece of paper crumbled in one of them. 

I folded it out as Danny and Harry got into the car.

****

THAT was how badly I wanted to get in yr pants.

Trixie ; 03384938204

**_call me, bub._**


End file.
